It’s really mind-boggling but this is democracy.

IT’S really a hair-raising issue. And by that I mean shocking rather than spine-chilling. I am sure few Malaysians could even imagine that we would come to this – hair salons in Kota Baru being ordered to remove posters of female models with uncovered hair.

If there is such a thing as hair extension, then here is a case of an extension of an earlier directive to owners of non-Muslim hair salons to stop their female hair stylists from cutting the hair of male customers.

That was the beginning of the painful cut, you may say. After all, in PAS-led Kelantan, there is such a thing as gender segregation at the supermarket check-outs. At state-approved concerts, the audience also has to be split up.

There were similar scenarios in Kedah when the previous PAS state government banned female artistes from performing at Chinese New Year shows in malls.

In fact, the Kota Baru rule on uncovered hair also applies to pictures of models, especially Muslims, who are featured on advertisement billboards.

As with most rules, where religion comes into play, it is always difficult to reverse them once they are enforced, given their sensitive nature.

Well, that’s what happens when voters give their mandate to religious hardliners. Unfortunately, the voters also included non-Muslims who were warned during the campaign for the general election. But many went ahead to endorse the hardliners.

In Temerloh, Barisan Nasional’s Datuk Saifuddin Abdullah lost to PAS Youth hardliner Nasrudin Hassan, who has made a name for himself protesting against every concert that comes to town.

He also organises yearly protests against Valentine’s Day celebrations.

The voters, sadly, dumped Saifuddin, who is known for his moderate stance, in favour of Nasruddin.

It’s really mind-boggling but this is democracy for you. The reality, as we all know, is that many non-Malay voters, angry with the Barisan, refused to listen to anything negative about PAS. Anyone who warned about the nature of PAS invariably invoked the wrath of many non-Malay voters.

But in the end, liberal-minded leaders like Saifuddin, who already had to face tremendous internal pressure from the right-wingers in the party, got rejected.

In Johor, PAS national information chief Suhaizan Kayat, who openly forbids Muslims from wishing Christians “Merry Christmas”, also contested in the general election but he was rejected.

And now, the Kota Baru local council is pushing hard to remove posters of female models who do not cover their heads.

But there should be a line drawn here – non-Muslims have every right to protest as the hair salons affected are run by non-Muslims and the models featured in the pictures are likely to be non-Muslims as well.

Even PAS Supporters Congress chairman Hu Pang Chaw reportedly said the move was not business-friendly and that it violated a local council by-law which required only Muslim models appearing in advertisements to cover their hair.

Well, what I cannot fathom is why Hu is still supporting the Islamist party despite the many outrageous decisions affecting non-Muslims.

The local council has even insisted that married couples, including non-Muslims, must sit separately in cinemas.

If we are not careful, it will not come as a surprise if PAS insists that non-Muslim models for hair shampoo advertisements must also cover their heads.

Much sadder, the protest against the ban on these posters has, again, come from the same political parties and individuals.

What has happened to the critical voices who are often so quick to jump in to post angry messages on their Facebook and Twitter on a wide variety of issues?

It’s another small step in the infringement of the rights of non-Muslims, but there will be larger implications in the long run. I am sure many of our moderate and fair-minded Muslims share the same sentiments.

Political expediency may be a factor but the silence of some politicians who claim to represent non-Muslims is indeed disturbing.

A lot, it seems. For starters, it’s much cooler to be a mixologist than a bartender.

I HAVE to confess that I have never heard of the word until recently. I thought they were just known as bartenders but now, many are known as mixologists.

Mixology is generally accepted as a slang term to refer to the “refined and in-depth study of the art and science of mixing”. A bartender or bar chef who has become an expert on mixing drinks is therefore known as a mixologist.

Well, to me he’s just mixing drinks and some of them do it pretty well, but I am still trying to figure out what the science behind it is.

But hey, there is a scientific ring to the term mixologist and it certainly sounds more authoritative and respectable than bartender.

Then there is the barista, who is essentially the person who prepares the coffee for you at Starbucks or Coffee Bean.

According to a report on the Internet, a barista is an Italian term for the bartender who works behind a counter, serving both hot, preferably an espresso, and cold drinks.

Certainly, barista sounds better than a kopi tiam waiter who has to take your order for kopi kaw with thick condensed milk.

Well, what’s in a name? Plenty! It’s much cooler, especially among the younger set, to sign up for a job that sounds respectable.

An advertisement for an administrative assistant is likely to elicit more responses than one looking for office boys. In the 1960s, they were known as peons but that’s an outdated term now.

I am told that even at nightclubs, patrons are no longer looking for guest relations officers (GROs) but club ambassadors. Night club hostesses? No way, that’s so 50s!

In schools, it’s not vogue to be known as the headmaster or principal – a school director surely sounds better.

Americans are notoriously famous for such title creations. In the United Kingdom, a manager is essentially someone who heads a department or office but in the United States, they would refer to this person as a vice-president, which does sound more powerful.

I had thought an evangelist is someone who preaches the Christian Gospel until I learnt recently that evangelist can also refer to a technology geek “who builds a critical mass of support for a given technology, and then establishes it as a technical standard in a market”.

In my time, the cosmetics salesgirl was simply someone who sells beauty products but now they must be known as beauty consultants. Beautician just isn’t good enough.

Life was so much simpler then. Housewives were just housewives. Then they became home makers and eventually home ministers!

During the 60s, hospitals used to be called sanitariums (or sanatoriums). Most dictionaries define sanitariums as places for “improvement or maintenance of health, especially for convalescents”.

Then they were called hospitals – which, according to the spirit of the word, meant a place where there’s hospitality.

By the 80s, hospitals were meant for the poor while the richer patients went to medical centres – where the charges are higher, of course. The term “sanitarium” is no longer used in most parts of the English-speaking world now.

Overnight, massage parlours also turned into spas and wellness centres, which sound more clinical but certainly no less seedy.

There are also many words that are unique to a particular country and are unlikely to be found in any dictionary. In Malaysia, we have the term “gostan” which is neither a Malay nor an English word. It’s actually “go astern” which, in simpler English, means reverse.

Then there is the popular term “going outstation”, which is uniquely Malaysian and Singaporean. It’s an old colonial British term to describe an officer travelling out of base when he goes from one station, or posting, to another. Certainly, for Malaysians, there’s really no station to go to except to travel to another state.

And now I have learned a new term – twerking – which an online dictionary described as “rhythmic gyrating of the lower fleshy extremities in a lascivious manner with the intent to elicit sexual arousal”.

Well, in simple language, in my time it was just sexual thrusts hiding behind what are supposedly dance movements.

As for me, whether one is a reporter, journalist or a writer, the term that best refers to people like us is the one used by columnist Karim Raslan who calls himself tukang cerita or story teller. We certainly have plenty of cerita to share each time we get into the writing mood.

Criminals are all coming to Malaysia and we seem to be easy pickings for the con artists.

WORD must have gone out to criminals all over the world that Malaysians are easily some of the most gullible people around. In their lingo, they probably say we are suckers, and what is sad is they are right.

There is also the perception that Malaysia’s international entry points allow for easy and unimpeded access to criminals and foreigners who come here not as tourists but for suspicious activities.

We also seem to be easily taken in by those who are white, or seem to look white, and believe they are all respectable well-off individuals, never mind that they come from financially stricken European countries.

A few may believe they also have better genetic stock, if we believe the stories from that bald Bosnian who also thinks he is good-looking and of great intellect.

But when it comes to con jobs, colour does not really matter. The con artists from Nigeria, who probably award diplomas for scams and other con jobs, have swindled many not only here but around the world too.

A few years ago, there was this con job where the perpetrators would convince a targeted victim to believe that the piles of bank­note-sized paper in a trunk or a safe were real money which had been dyed black or another colour supposedly to prevent detection by Customs.

The victim was then persuaded to pay for special chemicals to wash the “money” with a promise that he would share in the proceeds. The best part is that there were enough Malaysians, greedy and mental ones, who bought into this ridiculous scam.

And with the Internet boom, we started to get those outrageous e-mail from long-lost relatives of some corrupt civil servants, sometimes claiming to be from Zimbabwe, who want us to invest in some questionable deals. We would be promised a hefty commission to help the scums who supposedly could not take the money out of their country.

But this approach appears to be over-used now as even the most naive Malaysians are not buying into these silly cheating scams. So the African con men have re-invented themselves.

You have to credit them for their innovation. Outrageous as it may sound, they have taken on new identities as white men residing in the United States or Britain.

I can’t fathom how an African guy staying in a rented flat in Sentul can pass off as a suave, witty and charming Hugh Grant with impeccable English and a Chelsea address.

But each year, millions of ringgit go into their dirty hands because our gullible women, despite meeting these scoundrels via the Internet, never ask to talk to them and see them face to face via Skype or Face Time. It seems the sound of their voice is good enough.

It doesn’t matter that many of these African con men cannot even write well in English, but then many Malaysians also cannot do this now anyway!

According to says.com, “Malaysia is worse than Mexico in cyber crime. According to Sophos Security Threat Report 2013, Malaysia is the sixth most vulnerable to cyber crime.”

It said that listed among the 10 riskiest countries, Malaysia is also reported to be highly exposed to cyber crime with a reported RM1bil lost.

Then there are the Iranians. There are lots of Iranians in Kuala Lumpur and many of us can’t tell if they are rich oil sheikhs or drug smugglers.

The media is also filled with reports of Malaysian women who end up as mules for criminals who duped them to smuggle drugs – and all these women claimed they believed they were given free tickets to go on a paid holiday but had to pass the bag to someone while on transit.

Lately, we have South Americans entering Malaysia to target the homes of Malaysians. My brother walked into his home one day to find Latino-speaking individuals ransacking his house. Have we come to that?

Yes, they are all coming to Malaysia – the South Americans, the Nigerians and other Africans, and the Iranians.

As one writer, Norman Sukumaran, correctly said in the blog “OutSyed The Box”, “We have lost the fight against Indonesian overstayers and illegals, (but we) cannot now become a haven for Africans, Iranians and South Americans whose sole purpose to enter Malaysia is for criminal purposes.”

These criminals have given their countries a bad name and their decent, hardworking fellowmen who are students and professionals have found themselves lumped into the same category.

But who can blame Malaysians for feeling this way? We are already sick and tired of local hoodlums and the last thing we need are foreign criminals targeting us too.

Some of our politicians seem to be seeing shadows behind everything where there is none. From their perspective, there is intrigue, a hidden agenda and suspicious motives everywhere.

THERE seems to be no end to politicking in Malaysia. We thought the campaigning that reached its peak in the run-up to the general election in May would slowly wind down once the people had decided. But that was only wishful thinking.

We still are in election mode, judging by the endless bickering, growing suspicion over what everyone is saying, and the perception of a hidden agenda behind each issue.

After the polls, there were more ceramah and protests. Taking disputes to the courts was not enough in the battle to conquer the court of public opinion. And we all thought, naively, that everyone would just take a breather.

We all suffer from political fatigue. To be blunt, most of us probably feel nauseated. Surely the politicians, who are humans too, would want to get a break and make up for lost time with their spouses and family members. But no, they can’t seem to stop.

Everyone is talking about crime, the increase in the cost of living and the looming financial slowdown.

Well, we are also talking about Bosnian sperm.

But there seems to be a wide disconnect between our lives and that of our politicians, regardless of their political affiliation.

We do not see any of them explaining to us why our ringgit is weakening and how we should face the problems, even if there are external factors beyond our control. Those with children studying overseas are probably watching the exchange rates with eagle eyes and they certainly want to know what the future will hold.

Malaysians would also like to hear how we should gear up for the softening market as businessmen grapple with escalating costs and declining revenue and profits. It is not just a worry for those who run companies but also for their workers.

Instead, politicians are trying to outdo one another, trying to score points by making some pretty outrageous demands just to get their name and pictures in the media.

The main political parties in the country’s ruling coalition – Umno, the MCA and the MIC – are all holding their party polls very soon. PAS is having its internal polls too while the DAP is conducting a fresh election after its earlier vote tally blunder, which it continues to blame on a technical glitch.

In the case of the three main Barisan Nasional parties, we are talking about elections at all levels – from the branches to the divisions right to the top hierarchy.

We are pretty sure, judging from the activities on the ground and the desperate insecurity demonstrated by some politicians, that they are not doing much these days except to ensure their party positions are secured, or to get back a position.

Many have attempted to be champion spokesmen of their communities, flexing their political muscle, with some espousing views that smack with racial overtones.

Even the movies are not spared as politicians make laughable statements when they have not even watched the films and are unlikely to do so. But speak they must, and so they do.

Some of our politicians seem to be seeing shadows behind everything where there is none. From their perspective, there is intrigue, a hidden agenda and suspicious motives everywhere.

Reaction to the movie Tanda Putera is one example. The hysterical hostility towards the movie is unbelievable. I was among the earliest to be invited by Datuk Shuhaimi Baba, the director, to watch the show and to give my views.

I told her there should be more films like this because the world is beginning to think that we only watch movies about gangsters, ghosts and wife-beating husbands.

In Tanda Putera, the Chinese were not blamed for the riots but the communists and political activists were. This is the big difference which the politicians do not want to understand.

So is the unnerving reaction to The New Village. It is a period movie about new villages set in 1949, when most of us were not even born and the country was caught in a fight with the communists. We are now in the year 2013, yet we are still grappling with the ghosts of the past!

The communists in China have all become capitalists, drinking fine French wine, enrolling their kids in British boarding schools, keeping mistresses and becoming corrupt, as ordinary politicians in a democratic system do!

The only thing commie about the ruling elite in Beijing now is that they still carry party membership cards and uphold the red ideology to avoid a real election! Anything else red would be red wine and Manchester United.

We are still unsure if The New Village will ever make it to our cinemas. After all the party polls are over, perhaps.

Maybe by Christmas, although by then it would really be good luck to the producer because who would care about new villages in December and January as many of us would want to go on holidays and celebrate the year-end!

The holiday season is all about parties – celebratory ones, not political parties – and we just want to be silly, more than some politicians, as we usher in the coming year.

And we really hope that in the coming year, we will finally see the end to mindless politicking.

And can we please appeal to our politicians that they remember why we voted them in – to run the country, make us feel safe, plug financial leakages, seriously fight graft, postpone expensive projects and, if possible, stop using taxpayers money to put your faces on billboards?

While our nation is a country of endless possibilities, it is also a land of endless contradictions.

IT’S Merdeka Day. No Malaysian can possibly pass through the day (yesterday, to be precise) without a thought for our first Prime Minister Tunku Abdul Rahman.

That spellbinding image of Bapa Merdeka raising his right hand and leading the nation in shouting “Merdeka” seven times at the newly built Stadium Merdeka on Aug 31 1957 is etched forever in the minds of every Malaysian.

Nostalgia aside, I also wonder what the Tunku would have thought about the country and us, Malaysians, if he were alive today.

Yes, the slogan “Endless Possibilities” will soon be a buzzword but this is also a Land of Endless Contradictions.

But, as I wrote last week, I love these mind-boggling confusions. Malaysia is surely a more interesting place to live in than the clinically sterile Singapore.

Well, for starters, the Tunku would think we must have gone bonkers if we expect him to pester his Indonesian counterpart for help to ship in Indonesian maids and construction workers to Malaysia!

Bung Karno, as President Sukarno was called, would have freaked out and declared war on Malaysia, and not just a Confrontation!

But here we are, in 2013, and we expect Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak to go to Jakarta, or any place where President Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono is present, to ask him if the maids are coming soon.

Here’s the weird part about us Malaysians. We whine and grumble that there are too many foreigners in this country and in the same breath, we complain that the government is slacking by not getting us enough foreign labour.

Now, we are launching a campaign to send the illegals back – and we all know full well that those we send back will return the following week.

We used to blame the foreigners for every single crime in this country and now we are also blaming them for voting the ruling coalition back to power.

So who do we blame for the spike in crime now? The poor Indians – someone has to be the scapegoat, and for good measure we also blame the Tamil movie industry with its violent plots for influencing this 1.7 million minority group in our country to turn to a life of crime.

But the Tunku would have loved the over 100 TV channels available today with most of them showing re-runs of muscular men wrestling with giant catfish and giant snakes.

In his days, there were only two channels although the TV sets came with many knobs to tune in to other channels.

The Sports Toto draw was aired live every Sunday afternoon with Faridah Merican, now Datuk, hosting the “cabutan”. Malaysians were so bored then that watching the drawing of numbers became routine on a lazy Sunday afternoon.

But the Tunku would have been perplexed by what is shown on TV these days, though with his open mind, he probably would have cracked a joke or two over it.

Scantily-clad dancers gyrating on Astro’s MTV channel are a given but when it comes to the newspapers, the rules are totally the opposite. In print, armpits and navels cannot be exposed, in case the images send some of us into a sexual frenzy!

Well, it may be hard for many of us to believe but this is the Land of Countless Contradictions, and the exposure of armpits, mind you, is definitely regarded as “terlalu menggairahkan” (too arousing). We have been lectured on this often enough.

I am also sure the Tunku would be howling with laughter at some of the ridiculous antics of our politicians.

The golden age of our local cinema movies was during the time of the Tunku when we had P. Ramlee, the Vespa, curry puff hairstyle and the pop yeh yeh at nightclubs. We are talking class here.

But now, we have relegated ourselves to watching local movies of gangsters and hantu (ghosts) while movie makers attempting to make serious, clever movies on history find themselves subjected to threats and bullying – by politicians who have not even watched their movies!

Here’s the best part! A movie about a rapist who beats up his wife and visits a nightclub, wins the best movie of the year award, with the leading character being almost hero-worshipped.

And that’s not all, the Singaporean actor also wins the best local actor award!

If you are confused, I don’t blame you, because many of us are confused, and that’s why we keep on doing confusing things.

That’s not all – the Tunku was always a football fan. This is the man who turned the Merdeka football tournament into a premier event in the region.

That was the best of the best. It was pure “gaya, mutu dan keunggulan” (style, quality and elegance), as a commercial from back then used to say. We beat the South Koreans, the Myanmars and practically any other foreign team that set foot on our soil.

Now, everybody can beat us. But no one at the Football Association of Malaysia is held responsible, even as the guys from the Maldives, who are trying to save their island from sinking, are ranked higher than us. Macam biasa aje, bro!

And if we talk about freedom, the Tunku would be floored because after 56 years of independence, lovesick Malaysian women are losing millions of ringgit each year to African Romeos posing as handsome and wealthy Englishmen.

It is simply incredible that these con men in Puchong or Sentul are able to convince our gullible ones that they are living in the English countryside and are looking for Malaysian love.

But don’t get me wrong! I love this country! I repeat, lest some super-sensitive politician makes an issue out of this column, I love this country.

Well, there’s one thing we consistently do very well at every Merdeka celebration – we produce the best TV commercials for these special occasions.

And most Malaysians still can laugh at ourselves, or at least at the politicians. Happy Merdeka Day!